The topic is Stress. A dictionary defines Stress as “a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances.” What could these “adverse or very demanding circumstances” be? Bill Harris of Centerpointe Research® says “Stress is caused by our being out of sync with our map of reality.” What is this reality map idea about? Harris thinks we all carry around with us an idea of what reality is. He calls it our “map.” These maps include our expectations of how the world and life should be. For example, my map consists of the concept that all people should be respectful of and kind to others and all things. When I observe people not living up to my standard or view of the world, I become irritated, angry, Stressed.
Why is this bad for me? Since my map is not consistent with my reality, I will always be at some level of Stress. This Stress not only keeps me from being happy; it also has a deteriorating effect on my health and relations with others.
What can I do to reduce Stress? I could work on changing my map to be more realistic concerning the actions of others. If rather than having an expectation in my map I just had a preference, the possibility of being Stressed is reduced. I can accept an action that does not agree with a preference. I cannot readily accept that which goes against an expectation. Both methods are attempts to change my attitude to one more of reasonableness and acceptance thereby reducing Stress.
Of course, this is one simple example of being Stressed. In reality, we have infinite expectations about the world that are inconsistent with reality.
Centerpointe Research® is a registered Trade Mark of Centerpointe Research, Inc. of Beaverton, Oregon.